maximised freedom

A Blonde And A Lawyer Sit Next To Each Other On A Plane.

2009-06-04T10:50:00.000+10:00

The lawyer asks her to play a game.

If he asked her a question that she didn’t know the answer to, she would have to pay him five dollars; And every time the blonde asked the lawyer a question that he didn’t know the answer to, the lawyer had to pay the blonde 50 dollars.

So the lawyer asked the blonde his first question, “What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?” Without a word the blonde pays the lawyer five dollars.

The blonde then asks him, “What goes up a hill with four legs and down a hill with three?” The lawyer thinks about it, but finally gives up and pays the blonde 50 dollars.

Then the lawyer asked her what the answer was and without a word the blonde gave the lawyer five dollars.

40 Lessons I have Learnt

2009-01-31T03:15:00.002+11:00

Turning 40 is a milestone in almost anyone’s life. So for mine, I thought I’d commit to blog 40 things of value I have learnt so far in this journey of mine. They are in no particular order. If they resonate with you, great! However, I wrote it 'cos they are true for me. Please enjoy.

1: You can’t help someone more than they want help for themselves.

2: Some things are wiser not to say.

3: If shoes aren’t comfortable when you try them on, they never will be. You can’t “break in” uncomfortable shoes.

4: Gratitude is the stuff good attitudes are made from.

5: Forgiveness is freeing to the soul.

6: Clutter saps my energy.

7: I don’t have to hang onto things to have my needs met.

8: If you sow, you will reap.

9: God really never leaves us.

10: Delayed gratification is not a bad thing.

11: I function better when I get enough sleep.

12: Being near water makes me feel peaceful, and often joyous!

13: Regular events with family and friends over food, wine or music, inspire my soul.

14: Doing work that is not your highest calling quickly becomes tedious.

15: The most joyous sound in the world is a baby or child’s laugh.

16: Hate is like a poison pill you take to harm the other person. It only hurts you!

17: If my intuition tells me something, trust it! Things only ever go awry when I don’t.

18: We sometimes become so attached to something, we can’t see the forest for the trees. It’s time to let go and let God.

19: Martyr attitudes are just self-pity expressed to hurt the people you love.

20: You don’t have to do something perfectly for it to be a job well done.

21: Practice makes permanent, whether you’re doing it correctly or not.

22: I’d rather be inspired than motivated. It lasts longer.

23: If inspiration is the wings, consistency is the engine that gives the power to take flight.

24: My time with God keeps me centered and balanced.

25: Humility is not self-deprecation.

26: Some people, no matter how much I like or love them, are a drain on my energy.

27: Appropriate boundaries create better relationships.

28: Pick your battles. Some things are just not worth the energy to fight for it.

29: If you let the little things pile up on you, you never have enough focus to get the big things done. It’s the little foxes that spoil the vine.

30: I love to plan for good things, but I love the spontaneity of precious moments too.

31: Life moves in the direction of your most dominant thoughts.

32: If God is with me, then nothing stands in my way.

33: Dancing is a creative form of self-expression for me.

34: Being a perpetual student of life, is a good way to keep growing and learning about yourself.

35: Doing things for others does more for you than for them.

36: Being too controlling prevents lots of little blessings coming your way, and robs others of the opportunity of responsibility.

37: If someone is upset with me over something I had no control over or was not my responsibility, that speaks more of them than of me.

38: Taking time for me, means I have more of me for others.

39: Don’t sweat the more stuff, 'cos in the course of a year, 99% of it will be small stuff.

40: We all walk in our own measure of light. I cannot be expected to walk in someone else’s revelations, any more than they can walk in mine. They’re ok and I’m ok.

Finding "The One" The Second Time Around: A Conscious Way of Choosing Your Life Partner

2007-12-04T09:03:00.000+11:00

This is one of the most profound and synchronistic articles I have ever seen on the subject of relationships. I just had to share it with you, please enjoy.

yours positively
Danick

Finding "The One" The Second Time Around: A Conscious Way of Choosing Your Life PartnerFinding "The One" The Second Time Around: A Conscious Way of Choosing Your Life Partner

A few years ago I met a woman that I was sure was "The One." We had incredible chemistry! This was especially exciting because when I met her, my marriage of nineteen years was falling apart and I was worried that I would never experience passionate, committed love again. But about a year and a half into being with "The One", and being engaged to her, I began to see that, although we had chemistry, she wasn't right for me either! I was devastated at the break up of yet another intimate relationship. Would I ever find someone truly right for me?

After that break up I dated dozens of women, meeting most of them on the internet. But now I was wiser. I knew that chemistry, though essential, wasn't enough. Romance can survive on chemistry, a relationship can't. So one day I sat down at my computer and I got clear on what I wanted, beyond chemistry, in a woman and in the relationship I had with her. I embarked on what I call a conscious way of choosing my life partner. Instead of dating dozens of women hoping to find someone by the sheer law of averages, I stopped dating and got crystal clear on what I wanted. With in a month I met her, and one year later we became engaged!

I'm not promising that if you get clear on who and what you want, that you'll meet "The One" in such a short period of time. Then again, if you go into a restaurant and just sit there, merely looking at the menu, and never communicate to your server what you want, I can promise you that you'll go hungry!

So that day I decided that I could find "The One" the second (or almost third!) time around if I took a conscious approach. I wrote five questions to help me determine if a woman was "The One" for me. These questions became a safeguard against the danger of making a commitment based merely on chemistry.

Question #1:
Am I compromising any significant desire, dream or direction in my life to be with her? Years ago I remember reading something author Sam Keen wrote in his book, Fire In The Belly. It was written to men, but I think it applies to anyone. He said, "There are two questions every man must ask himself. First, 'where am I going?' And secondly, 'who do I want to go with me?' And don't ever get them reversed!" For a time, I did.

When I was engaged with the woman I thought was "The One," I was compromising two key purposes of my life. The first was fatherhood. She lived over one thousand miles away from my son and was unwilling to move. I wanted to live near my son, but I talked myself out of that and moved in with her anyway. Secondly, I was holding myself back from fully following my deepest spiritual path, because to have done so, would have taken us in very different directions. My path was not right, hers was not wrong. They were just significantly different. But because I was in love and we had all that chemistry, I was compromising on another significant purpose to be with her.

Are you giving up anything really important to you—a life long dream, a core purpose, in order to be with this person? Maybe they don't want children and you do. But you're madly in love, the chemistry is off the charts!, and so you're trying to convince yourself that having kids isn't that important to you. Or maybe you always wanted to go back to school or start a business or move to the beach, but you're hesitating because following those dreams might be trouble for your relationship.

One of the ways you know that he or she is "The One," is that there is nothing of importance that you are giving up in exchange for being in the relationship. Healthy relationships support the pursuit of dreams. They don't ask, "what's best for the relationship," but rather, "what brings the greatest aliveness to the individuals in the relationship." Many people believe that compromise is a good thing in a relationship. That's a total lie. Compromise is a red flag. You don't have to abandon your dreams to be with someone. If you do, it's a sign you're with the wrong person!

Question #2:
Does she have all, absolutely all of my "deal makers" and none of my "deal breakers"? This question comes from my favorite relationship authors, Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks. That day at my computer, I got clear on a couple of basics I had to have and would not stand for in a partner. The Hendrick's call them their "Absolute Yes-es" and "Absolute No-s". I think of them as "deal makers" and "deal breakers."

For instance, my primary "deal maker" is having a woman who is completely devoted to her spiritual growth, above all else. Her aliveness is more important than me, her kids, her job—everything. Secondly, I want a woman who takes 100% responsibility for her experiences, problems and emotions. I'm not interested in relating intimately with a blamer or a victim. Thirdly, I want an open woman, one who reveals her thoughts, fears, wants and feelings. And lastly, I want someone committed to a healthy lifestyle. Those were my "deal makers.

"My "deal breakers" were easy to identify. One of the benefits of having an ex or two is that you get really clear on what you don't want! My "deal breakers" were women who smoked, even occasionally; women that were sexually disinterested, workaholics, and lastly, women with children under the age of ten. I have no judgment about those issues, they're just not what I want in my life. Again, if any of those things were true, I would end the relationship immediately. That was my new commitment.

With my ex-fiancée, I was fudging on a couple of them. Why? Well, as I've said, there was chemistry. But also, beneath the surface I had a scarcity mindset. Like many people, I thought there was a shortage of women perfectly suited for me. And if you hold that belief, you'll likely overlook something significant, especially if the physical attraction is high. The truth is that there are many men and women that embody what you are looking for. And the universe will bring them to you if you truly want to find "The One" and refuse to settle. It's happened for me. My fiancée meets all, absolutely all of my "deal makers," and none of my "deal breakers."

So, here's the challenging part of this question. You can't fudge on any of your "deal makers" or "deal breakers." Not even one. These are the basics and they are non-negotiable. If he's George Clooney, but snores, if that's a "deal breaker" for you, you have got to cut him loose. If she's Faith Hill and smokes, again, if that's a "deal breaker," end it immediately.

Question #3:
Does the physical intimacy between us have a spiritual quality unlike anything I have ever experienced before? This is a tricky question and it's very easy to misunderstand. I'm not talking about his or her looks or love-making techniques. This question is about what happens in of each of you—spiritually, when you're with the other. I believe that one of the ways you know someone is "The One" is that your intimate moments feel spiritual not merely physical. Of course sex with your partner may be ravishing or erotic or playful or tenderly romantic. But even in a variety of moods, you sense something spiritual is happening. Your experience is deeper than your body, it touches your core, your essence. Your intimacy opens a kind of spiritual presence in you, a place of openness, oneness and love.

David Deida writes beautifully of the spiritual potential of our sexuality. "As your loving penetrates your partner's depth, and his or her resistances melt, your love meets your partner's. Your openness merges with his or her openness. Together, your loving becomes one. In moments like this, love is beholding love through the eyes of you and your partner. There is no difference, just one love, expressed through two bodies. This is enlightened sex."

All of us are at different points on our spiritual journeys'. So our ability to experience what Deida writes about, the very presence of God through sexual union, will vary depending on our intentions and life-long practices. Yet, sex with "The One," no matter where you are on your spiritual journey, will be unlike anything you have encountered in your life. Maybe your love making doesn't yet take you to the ends of the universe where you're able to feel oneness with God, but you know that something special is happening between the two of you, something bigger than you, something wonderfully and spiritually unexplainable. If so, he or she is "The One."

Question #4:
Does this person, and the relationship I have with them, inspire me to be a better man? Remember the scene in the movie, As Good As It Gets where Helen Hunt is asking Jack Nicholson for a compliment? Jack plays a character who is an obsessive compulsive moron and he can't seem to come up with anything positive to say about her. She gets frustrated and is about to walk out of the restaurant, when he suddenly blurts out, "You make me want to be a better man." She was breathless, dumbfounded and floored by what he said. Being in a relationship was having an incredible impact on him. If there was ever a phrase that screams, "You're the one for me!" it is this one: "You make me want to be a better man"—or woman.

Since I used to be a professional golfer, I call this the "Tiger Woods" effect. I imagine that if I was to play golf with Tiger (I've played in tournaments with him, but never in the same group), I would really want to be at my best. I would really want to "show up." He would make me want to be a better golfer.

Does being in a relationship with your partner have the "Tiger Woods" effect on you? Is the relationship good for your overall development as a person and as a spiritual being? Are you growing, not as a result of the relationship, but in the midst of it? Your relationship is a kind of "soil" in which both of you are planted. Is the "soil" of your relationship producing growth and life? I notice that since being with my fiancée, I have made some incredible shifts in my life and career. I'm committed to my spiritual path like never before. My purpose is clear. I'm taking risks in my life that are challenging me and bringing incredible aliveness to my spirit. The bottom line is that good things are happening in me while I'm around her.

Don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying that it's our partner's job to bring about our personal evolution. That's your job and it's my job. I'm not advocating co-dependence. My point is that being around my fiancée makes me want to be my best, she makes me want to be a better man. Since you've been dating, do you notice yourself dreaming, growing, expanding and becoming the person you know you can be?

Question #5:
Would I be completely happy, if from this moment on, nothing about her or our relationship would ever change? I've saved the most critical question for last. What if nothing ever changes about your partner? What if, in say, five years, he or she is exactly the same? What if he never gets better at communicating his feelings? What if she never loses weight? What if his work habits never change? What if he never makes more money? What if she never becomes more disciplined with credit cards? What if he never drinks less? Just for a moment, ask yourself, what if he or she never changes? Is your current reality something you authentically celebrate?

If you are in love with someone's potential, you have got problems. First of all, to think that they should be different is arrogant on your part. They are perfect the way they are. They may not be perfect for you, but they're perfect nonetheless. Second, people never change because others want them to. You can't be in love with fantasy. You must be in love with reality, the person they are now.

The primary reason I know my fiancée is "The One," is that for the first time in my relational life, I am not in love with who I hope my woman will become. I'm in love with her, now. I love who she is and everything about her, right now. (This may be because I'm finally in love with myself and not my own potential, but that's a different article!) It's not easy to admit this, but in all my previous relationships, I loved conditionally. I was always hoping or wanting something to change about them. In past relationships, I was hoping the woman in my life would become more interested in sex, or lose weight or take an interest in spiritual things. I didn't really love them. I loved who I thought they should be.

Are you in love with your partner or their potential? Do you celebrate at the thought of nothing changing? Let go of hoping your partner will get thinner, smarter, richer, sexier, happier, or cheaper than they are right now. Assume they won't. Assume nothing will change. Are they still "The One?"

Conclusion I hear a voice inside me that says it shouldn't be this hard to identify "The One." Shouldn't we just know? Don't you just know when you've found the right person? Well, the high number of divorces that take place within the first three years of marriage says "NO." And in my personal experience, the answer is absolutely "NO!" Chemistry can cloud your thinking and it is not a solid foundation for a long term relationship. But if you get past passion, personality and pheromones and commit to a conscious approach to finding your life partner, by asking yourself these five questions, you'll not only end up with an incredible relationship, but you'll also save yourself a lot of heartbreak and misery.

Author's Bio: Roy Biancalana is a personal coach living in Orlando, Florida. You can reach him at 407-687-3387 or at www.coachingwithroy.com.

Self Confidence Secrets - Measure Your Success

2007-10-31T08:52:00.000+11:00

Hello,
Today I'd like you to read a really helpful article, to help you to see and celebrate your successes. It's amazing the little lightbulb moments we can all have when we recognise ourselves in someone elses story...Enjoy!

Would you like to be confident in the things you do? Most people would. The problem is that many people aren't sure how. They think it is some mystical trait that some people seem to have and others don't. Actually, being confident in yourself and your ability to achieve your goals is a skill that can be learned.

Let's say you've decided to move forward in your efforts to achieve your goals and have taken action. Congratulations for reaching this point! Along the way you will certainly experience many victories. Yet there will also be challenges. To keep yourself going, you are going to need lots of support from one very important person: Yourself! This support comes in the form of setting achievable goals, supportive self-talk, self-monitoring to acknowledge success, and plenty of rewards along the way.

Today's theme is the crucial importance of acknowledging success. To balance the scale of triumphs and challenges, the skill needed is learning to recognize and feel good about all the little steps you take each day, and the efforts you put forth toward achieving your goal. Building on every little victory acts like fuel to your confidence. Achieving any new goal isn't easy. It takes decision, hard work, effort, and dedication. But that is what this life is about... setting new goals for ourselves and accomplishing those goals. Learning to feel good along the path to something new is what makes life a grand adventure.

"Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful." – Albert Schweitzer

WHY ACKNOWLEDGE SUCCESS?
For many, the journey toward reaching the overall goal is often a long road. It's frequently so full of experiences and opportunities (okay, challenges) that we often don't notice the gradual change that is occurring. We don't recognize the progress we have made. This error of self-acknowledgment can be devastating and stop us dead in our tracks.

One surefire way of putting out your own fire is to dismiss your success. Let's imagine you've been binging on food for quite a few days. Through much effort and determination, you manage to stay binge-free for three days. Following these three days, you binge again. What are you most likely to do with this situation?
* Do you count those three days as success?
* Do you dismiss those three days as proof that since they didn't last, you are not good enough to have what you want -- now falling into helplessness or hopelessness?
* Do you use those three days (and subsequent relapse) as an occasion to self-condemn and shame yourself?
* Do those three days count for anything wonderful in your book?

WHEN TO ACKNOWLEDGE SUCCESS
One day, I decided I wanted to increase the amount of water I was drinking each day. I thought this goal through and decided that the best way to achieve success would be to drink one bottle of water each morning as I was getting ready for my day. After a few weeks had gone by, I pondered my goal. I realized that almost every morning I had drunk one full bottle of water. Had I achieved success with my goal? How long must a goal be achieved before I could call myself successful? Contemplating, I became aware of my own particularly nasty habit. I set goals for myself. With enough time, my goals became habits. But I had no mental criteria established for when I could call myself successful.

There was no endpoint of "How do I know I've achieved my goal?" And since there was no endpoint, there was no feeling good at the end of my goal. I was running my own life story of not being good enough for myself, and having to earn my own love but never succeeding. I sat there amazed at my own self-realization. I asked, "How long must I maintain a behavior before I can call myself successful?" The answer came immediately: "The very first time the behavior is achieved, you are successful." Wow! This about blew me away. I successfully achieved my goal the first day I followed through with my intention. No wonder I never felt enough. I was completely failing to recognize, acknowledge, or celebrate my strengths, efforts, and my achievements.

Many of the people I work with also have no internal criteria established for knowing when they are successful. Oh, sure, they may say when they lose 40 pounds, then they will be successful. Or when they stop binging, then they will be happy. But what happens when they lose those 40 pounds or stop binging for several days? Success is never measured, never celebrated, never acknowledged. Eventually a few pounds creep back on or a relapse in binge behavior occurs. Wouldn't you know it? This gets acknowledged! Lots of negative self-talk, huge emotion, beastly feelings of self-reproach... now there is evidence that success cannot be achieved. Without being conscious of it, the criteria were that if the weight was maintained forever, or a binge never occurred again, then success would be achieved. The problem with this strategy? Success can't be measured until forever occurs, meaning success never occurs.

"Success is never final. Failure is never fatal. Courage is what counts." – Sir Winston Churchill

SUCCESS EXERCISE
Close your eyes and relax. Think of a success you had today. Maybe it was feeling good, or deciding to drive past the fast food restaurant, or choosing to sit still while envisioning your goal, or laughing instead of feeling heavy. Maybe you overcame an urge, and even though later you didn't overcome the urge, that first "overcoming" was a success. You cannot change the fact of it or deny that it was a success.

Remember your goals. Recall your successes of the day. Remember your efforts. Get in touch with your very being. Feel your physical body. Breathe in... breathe out. Acknowledge your successes over and over again in your mind. Say to yourself, "I was truly successful. There is no denying that." Imagine the lightness of your joy is spreading all around, filling your body. It is filling your chest, spreading to your abdominal cavity reaching towards your thighs, legs, and feet. Think of a similar spread to your shoulders, arms, hand, head, neck, and face. Now your whole body is filled with radiant blissful lightness. You are calm and centered and feeling really good. Nourish your goal by looking for more successes. Bring your goal life and light through praise and intention and enthusiasm. Strengthen your goal by feeding it love. Breathe in... breathe out.

DO YOU:
1. Expect the best from yourself?
2. Understand your needs and use this information to create an environment that builds your motivation?
3. Establish standards of excellence that are attainable for yourself?
4. Create an environment where failure isn't fatal?
5. Encourage yourself or nag yourself?
6. Recognize and applaud your efforts?
7. Use a mixture of positive and negative reinforcement (acknowledge without judgment, but with honesty, your failures)?

About the Author: Helping people let go of self-destructive thoughts, emotions, and behaviors has been the life work of Dr. Annette Colby. Her fascination with the power of the mind, emotions, spirituality, and physicality has led her to become a leader in the field of personal growth and consciousness. She is a valued counselor, and an inspiring teacher, as well as an independent writer, mentor, and guide. She is a highly sought-after trainer with a unique ability to inform and inspire individuals to open their hearts, love more openly, and pursue their dreams. Go here for her free inspirational newsletter, articles, and information: http://www.LovingMiracles.com Miracles@AnnetteColby.com 972.985.8750 "Opening Creative Portals to Success"

3 Amazing Videos

2007-08-22T10:12:00.000+10:00

It's been a while since I've made contact. I've returned from my travels, and will have much to draw on for future articles. In the meantime, here are 3 videos for you to enjoy. The first could change the world by degrees, second is so funny, I was laughing out loud for most of it...ROFL, and the last will inspire to such a great degree...guaranteed to touch your heart.

Check them out for yourself http://www.selfgrowth.com/3amazingvideos.html

Stay tuned. Enjoy!

Danick

7 Keys For Joyful Living

2007-05-04T08:27:00.000+10:00

I found an article today that I wished to share with you all. Please enjoy this article by Chris Widener, writer of "The Angel Within", a little book I thoroughly enjoyed recently, and which you can find links to on my product page. Here are some thoughts for finding and experiencing joy in your life. If there were one thing I could wish upon my family, friends and the readers of this Ezine, it would be joy in everything they do!

Know your purpose. Nothing will bring you joy more than knowing what it is that you are about on this earth. Not knowing brings sadness, wondering, fear and lack of fulfillment. Above all, find out what your unique purpose is here on this earth - then fulfill it! As you do, you will experience joy!

Live purposefully. This is a follow up to number one. It is one thing to know your purpose, but then you need to live according to that purpose. This is a matter of priorities. Let your actions and schedule reflect your purpose. Don't react to circumstances and let them cause you to live without your purpose fully in site. Living without your purpose will cause frustration. Living purposefully will bring you deep satisfaction and joy!

Stretch yourself. Don't settle into the status quo. That will leave you unfulfilled. Always look to stretch yourself. Whatever you are doing, stretch yourself to do more! Stretching yourself will break the limits you have set for yourself and will cause you to find joy in your expanded horizons!

Give more than you take. It brings happiness to accumulate. It brings joy to give away. Sure, getting the car you worked hard for will bring you a sense of satisfaction and even happiness. But it won't bring you joy. Giving something away to the less fortunate will bring you deep, abiding joy.

Surprise yourself and others too. The words here are spontaneity and surprise! Every once in a while, do the unexpected. It will cause everybody to sit back and say, "Wow, where did that come from?" It will put a little joy in your life, and theirs.

Indulge yourself sometimes. Too much indulgence and you are caught in the happiness trap -- looking for the next purchase, celebration, etc., to bring you a little "happiness high." But if you will allow yourself an infrequent indulgence as a reward for a job well done and a life well lived, you will appreciate the indulgence and experience the joy of it.

Laugh a little - no, a lot! Most people are just too serious. We need to laugh a little - no, a lot! Learn to laugh daily, even if you have to learn to laugh in bad situations. This life is to be enjoyed! The next time you go to the movie rental store, get a comedy and let loose! Let yourself laugh!

Joy can be yours! Look for it, pursue it and enjoy it!

Chris Widener

When The Student Is Ready, The Teacher Will Appear!

2007-04-10T09:49:00.000+10:00

Today I have a treat for you. An article by Stephen Pierce. 
I'm sure you'll find it both comforting and inspiring.


Everything that happens to us happens in purpose. And sometimes, one
thing leads to another. Instead of locking yourself up in your cage
of fears and crying over past heartaches, embarrassment and
failures, treat them as your teachers and they will become your
tools in both self improvement and success.

I remember watching the movie called Patch Adams.
Its one great film that will help you improve yourself. Hunter
"patch" Adams is a medical student who failed to make it through the
board exams. After months of suffering in melancholy, depression and
suicidal attempts - he decided to seek for medical attention and
voluntarily admitted himself in a psychiatric ward. 

His months of stay in the hospital led him to meeting different kinds of people.
Sick people in that matter. He met a catatonic, a mentally retarded, a
schizophrenic and so on. Patch found ways of treating his own ailment and
finally realized he has to get back on track. He woke up
one morning realizing that after all the failure and pains he has
gone through, he still want to become the a doctor.

He carries with himself a positive attitude that brought him self improvement
and success. He didn't only improved himself, but also the life of the people
around him and the quality of life. Did he succeed? Needless to say, he became
the best doctor his country has ever known.

So, when does self improvement become synonymous with success? Where do we
start? Take these tips, friends...

*Stop thinking and feeling as if you're a failure, because you're not.
How can others accept you if YOU can't accept YOU?

*When you see hunks and models on TV, think more on self
improvement, not self pitying. Self acceptance is not just about
having nice slender legs, or great abs. Concentrate on inner beauty.

*When people feel so down and low about themselves, help them move
up. Don't go down with them. They'll pull you down further and both
of you will end up feeling inferior.

*The world is a large room for lessons, not mistakes. Don't feel
stupid and doomed forever just because you failed on a project.
There's always a next time. Make rooms for self improvement.

*Take things one at a time. You don't  expect black sheep's to be
goody-two-shoes in just a snap of a finger. Self improvement is a
one day at a time process.

*Self improvement results to inner stability, personality
development and dig this .... SUCCESS. It comes from self confidence,
self appreciation and self esteem.

* Set meaningful and achievable goals. Self improvement doesn't turn
you to be the exact replica of Cameron Diaz or Ralph Fiennes. It
hopes and aims to result to an improved and better YOU.

*Little things mean BIG to other people. Sometimes, we don't realize
that the little things that we do like a pat on the back, saying
"hi" or "hello", greeting someone "good day" or telling Mr. Smith
something like "hey, I love your tie!" are simple things that mean
so much to other people. When we're being appreciative about
beautiful things around us and other people, we also become
beautiful to them.

*When you're willing to accept change and go through the process of
self improvement, it doesn't mean that everyone else is. The world
is a place where people of different values and attitude hang out.
Sometimes, even if you think you and your best friend always like to
do the same thing together at the same time, she would most likely
decline an invitation for self improvement.

We should always remember that there's no such thing as 'over night
success'. Its always a wonderful feeling to hold on to the things
that you already have now, realizing that those are just one of the
things you once wished for. A very nice quote says that "When the
student is ready, the teacher will appear."  We are all here to
learn our lessons. When we open our doors for self improvement,
we increase our chances to head to the road of success.


Stephen Pierce

The Best Test by Chris Widener

2007-03-02T08:17:00.000+11:00

Some time ago, I spoke to a group of salespeople in Kansas City as they kicked off their new team. It was exciting to see them get excited about making a difference through their work.

The topic they assigned me was "Simply the Best." So as I prepared, I asked myself, "What characteristics would help someone pass the "Best" test? That is, what are the characteristics of those who become the "best" at what they do? Here are the thoughts I shared with them:

The Best are Optimists.
You can't get to the top if you don't think that there is a top or if you think you can't make it. One characteristic of those who reach the peak is that they always believe that things can get better or be done better. This pushes them on to be their best.

The Best have Vision.
They can see ahead of the pack. Their eyes aren't locked into the here and now. They see the bright future and what things will look like when they reach their destiny. While working hard for today, they live for the future! They do what Stephen Covey calls begin with the end in mind.

The Best Relentlessly Pursue Excellence.
The status quo is not for them. They want to be the best and experience the best. And that means giving their best. They go the extra mile so that in everything they do, in everything they say and think, they are striving for excellence.

The Best have a Life Long Habit of Personal Growth.
They don't want to stay at the level they are at. They want to grow in their work, their intellect, their spirituality, their relationships, and in every area of their life. And they discipline themselves to put themselves in situations wherein they grow. Personal growth doesn't "just happen." You choose to grow. I always suggest what Zig Ziglar does and that is to enroll in "Automobile University." Whenever you are driving around, listen to a personal or professional growth tape or CD. Over the long run you will grow. Also, read more. The old saying is true: Leaders are readers. So are those who pass the "Best" test.

The Best Understand that They will be Pushed by the Competition - and They Welcome It.
Like the lead runner in the race who has someone on his heels, the best know that the competition is right behind them. They love it though because they know that the competition keeps them from becoming lazy and resting on their laurels. Instead, the competition pushes them to go faster and to achieve more - to remain the best by forging ahead.

The Best have a Quest for Leadership.
Someone has to lead - it may as well be the best! Those who attain it get there because they want to. They want to lead and help make a difference. And they want to be equipped with the skills necessary to lead others on to a better place.

The Best Leave a Legacy.
They aren't in it just for themselves, though they will surely reap the rewards of being the best. Rather, the build things that last beyond themselves, things that can be enjoyed by others as well.

The Best are Adept at the Two Most Important Pieces of Time and Personal Management: Prioritize and Execute.
Just like weight loss boils down to eat right and exercise, personal management boils down to prioritize and execute. First, prioritize your activities. The important stuff goes on the top. Then, execute: do them. The best have habits and discipline that get them to the top by doing the best things and doing them first.

The Best Focus on Building Relationships.
Success does not come alone. Everyone who achieves much does it with the help of countless others. How do the Best get others to help them? They treat them right. They embrace them and help them. People become the best because they help other people, and people like them.

The Best Make no Excuses.
When they fail they admit it and move on. They get back up and do it right the next time. They let their actions speak loader than their words. They stand tall and do the right thing the next time. No excuses, just results.

The Best Understand that the Good is the Enemy of the Best.
Yes, they could say, "this is good." But that would mean they have settled for less than the best. Many people think that good is good. Good is not good. Good is the enemy because it keeps us from the best. Choose your side: the good or the best. The Best choose, you guessed it, the
Best.

The Best Dare to Dream.
While others live the mundane and settle into a life they never bargained for, a rut, the Best dream of a better life. And then they take the risks necessary to achieve their dreams. They live by Teddy Roosevelt's quote: Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs though checkered by failure, then to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the grey twilit that knows neither victory nor defeat.

Want to be the best at what you do? Take inventory on the above characteristics and then start moving to bring your life in line with the characteristics of the "best." Then when you get to the top you will know that you have passed the "Best" test.

Chris Widener International
2835 Exchange Blvd., Suite 200
Southlake, TX 76092
877-929-0439
International and/or Dallas/Ft Worth - 817-442-5407

How To Stay Young (by George Carlin)

2006-11-20T08:21:00.000+11:00

HOW TO STAY YOUNG by George Carlin

Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.
Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.
Enjoy the simple things.
Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

The Legacy Of A Life Lived With Passion And Purpose

2006-09-16T15:44:00.000+10:00

This last fortnight has seen some sad news for my fiance and I personally, as well as Australia and the world. Australia has lost some of our favourite sons on recent days and we mourn their passing. We have lost Steve Irwin, Peter Brock and old Eric.

Steve Irwin touched the lives of millions around the world with his passion and energy. He changed the way many thought of and their attitude towards wildlife and conservation. He changed the attitude of fear to one of respect for many dangerous and endangered species in the wild. He literally put his money where his mouth was, by spending huge sums of his personal wealth and royalties, on wildlife preservation and environmental preservation through his many and varied initiatives. He touched the lives of his family by being a devoted and loving father and husband.

Even though I never knew him personally, he also touched me through his passion and legacy. I was shocked and saddened at the news of his passing. He left such a great legacy because he lived with purpose and passion. He understood the secret to the meaning of life which so many seek. We are not here for ourselves, we are here to live with purpose and passion and leave a legacy of good for those we leave behind, even if our lives are shortened by a quirk of fate or destiny. None of us knows how long we have. We are never too young or too old to start living with purpose and passion to leave a legacy for those whose lives we've touched, directly or indirectly.

My fiance had news this week of the death of a great friend. An older Aboriginal man, named Eric, whose life had so dramatically affected the life of my fiance and that of Eric's own community that his legacy left an indelible mark on all those who had the privilege to be close to him in life. Crucially, before he died, my fiance had opportunity to express to Old Eric, how deeply touched he had been by him, and how much he had learnt from him, and most importantly, how much he cared for him. Michael did not realise it at the time, but in that last conversation he had with Old Eric, he was saying goodbye and thankyou. His one regret is that though separated by nearly 2000Km, Michael did not get to visit Eric as he had intended before Eric died. The busy-ness of job and life waylaid him and he never made it.

Often it's the things that we don't do or say in life that we regret. It is an important issue for us all to consider, our legacy, our purpose and our passion. What are we here for? Let's live our lives so that we don't have regrets. Say the important things to each other. Say thanks to the people who have touched our lives, taught us and loved us. Let's live life with passion and purpose, with grateful hearts that we are not alone in life. That life and love can touch us and teach us. Let's consider our legacy. What will we be remembered for? What footprint will we leave on this world and it's precious people and environment when we pass on?

Let life touch you. Live without regret. Define your purpose and live it with passion. Go for it.

yours positively
Danick

Finish Your Day Before You Begin It!

2006-08-29T08:09:00.000+10:00

The key to easing that frustration is to have a plan for your day before you begin the day. I know, I know, how can you take the time to plan your day when you already have more than enough to do – don’t add one more thing! But really what you want is for your day to produce results. To get the results you want, you must find the time to do the activities necessary to reach the goals you have set. That doesn’t just happen - that takes planning! Many people resist the idea of planning their day because it seems too structured, too much of a hassle, and who has time to plan anyway??

However, there are many benefits to planning your day. It helps you to focus on your priorities - it is not about getting everything done in a day - it is about getting the important things done in your day. Think about how differently you would feel at the end of the day if you knew that you had accomplished the four most important activities you needed to do that day. Yes, you still have plenty of things that didn’t get done – but instead of being controlled by your day – you actually controlled the day!

Planning your day enables you to make better decisions and actually increases your control over your day. A planned day reduces stress and can allow more creativity and even “create” more time in your day! Planning your day doesn’t have to take more than 15 minutes - 1% of your day. The other 99% can be used in executing your plan. Depending on your energy levels and your work, you can choose when these 15 minutes of planning occur - either first thing in the morning or last thing at night.

The key to successful planning is to plan both your work and your time. Simply ask yourself a few questions. First, think about the results - what do you expect to accomplish today? Second, think about activities - what will you have to do to get those results? (A written to-do list will increase your productivity dramatically.) Next, decide on priorities - what is most important, of second importance, etc. You now have a work plan for your day. Then you have to decide how much time you estimate it will take to do each task, and when in your schedule you can actually complete the task. Always have some room in your day unscheduled - this allows you the flexibility you need to handle those unexpected things you can’t control.

So every day you look at your values and the goals you have set to strengthen those values and you plan time in your day to work towards both your personal and professional goals. Build your to-do list from yesterday’s unfinished business and today’s tasks. Prioritize what needs to be done and when. Now, in a short amount of time, you can face your day with a plan that will help you conquer your world! (Or at least get you through it with your sanity intact!)

This article is an excerpt from Zig Ziglar’s Difference Maker Modules
A talented author and speaker, Zig Ziglar has an appeal that transcends barriers of age, culture and occupation. Since 1970, he has traveled over five million miles across the world delivering powerful life improvement messages, cultivating the energy of change.He has shared the platform with such distinguished Americans as Presidents Ford, Reagan and Bush, General Norman Schwarzkopf, Secretary of State Colin Powell, Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, Paul Harvey, Dr. Robert Schuller, plus numerous U.S. congressmen and governors. A well-known authority on complete and balanced success, Zig Ziglar has been recognized three times in the Congressional Record of the United States - for his work with youth in the drug war, and for his dedication to America and the free enterprise system.

Do You Struggle With Being Able To Meditate?

2006-07-30T11:10:00.000+10:00

Hiya,

Many people have indicated to me that they have an inability to get still and centred in order to meditate. For some people, doing and active meditation such as going for a drive, or a walk on the beach may be a better way to 'collect yourself' as I call it. Collecting your thoughts and processing and digesting thoughts and feelings on life, events, desires, spirit etc.

Jamie Lyn has written an easy to understand article on the subject which I've included below. I believe it's an important part of a successful persons day, and you are a successful person, so enjoy the article.

yours positively
Danick

Why meditate? and a quick and simple technique Anyone canincorporate into their daily rountine:
Why Meditate? -The reasons and benefits are many and profound! Modern science has shown that relaxation of the mind has ahealing effect on the body, helping people to reduce stress and,as a result, prevent and treat a whole host of mental andphysical dieases and ailments - even something as simple as thecommon cold.
In a meditative state, metabolic processes, includingrespiration and blood flow, slow down. Key words—SLOW DOWN.
Meditation is a technique that helps us focus and calms the mindresulting in a relaxed and restful state of physical and mentalbeing.
Meditation is generally focused on one constant thing,usually your breath. It is an effective tool to gain mindcontrol, self-awareness and understanding that eventually leadto inner calm and peacefulness.
And meditating does not require any great length of time. Itonly takes some conscious effort. You need only take fiveminutes to slow down, focus on the center of your body and letthe rest of the moment happen.
The point is to achieve a sense of being centered and letting goof every day concerns.
Meditation is simply taking a moment to BE. A big mistake that alot of people make is thinking it is too time consuming orcomplicated and then not giving it a try at all.
A very quick and simple meditation technique is to concentrateon and control your breathing pattern for a few minutes. Evernotice when someone says the word “breathe," you do? That rightthere is controlling your pattern.
Take a deep breath in and slowly let it out- as simple as it maysound - you have just done a form of meditation!Try it for as little as 5-10 minutes a day when need be and see howthis simple technique can calm, center and elevate your mind,body & spirit!
Until next time....
To Your Mind, Body & Spirit!
Many blessings ~
Jamie Lynn
P.S. Do you have any family, friends or collegues that would beinterested and/or might benefit from our Newsletter? If so,please feel free to guide them on over! -www.meditationandmore.com

"A strong mental attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug"

To Have More You Need To Become More

2006-07-21T09:41:00.000+10:00

Hiya,

How's life with you? I've been a bit belated getting my next blog post to you. This time I'd like to share with you an excerpt from one of my mentors, Jim Rohn. Jim Rohn is regarded as one of the foremost business philosophers of the twentieth century, and has been mentor to the likes of Anthony Robbins, Mark Hughes, Mike Litman and Rod Moore, just to name a few. So please enjoy these couple of minutes of inspiration:

The Miracle of Personal Development
By Jim Rohn

One day Mr. Shoaff said, "Jim, if you want to be wealthy and happy, learn this lesson well: Learn to work harder on yourself than you do on your job."Since that time I've been working on my own personal development. And I must admit that this has been the most challenging assignment of all. This business of personal development lasts a lifetime.You see, what you become is far more important than what you get. The important question to ask on the job is not, "What am I getting?" Instead, you should ask, "What am I becoming?" Getting and becoming are like Siamese twins: What you become directly influences what you get. Think of it this way: Most of what you have today you have attracted by becoming the person you are today.I've also found that income rarely exceeds personal development. Sometimes income takes a lucky jump, but unless you learn to handle the responsibilities that come with it, it will usually shrink back to the amount you can handle.If someone hands you a million dollars, you'd better hurry up and become a millionaire. A very rich man once said, "If you took all the money in the world and divided it equally among everybody, it would soon be back in the same pockets it was before."It is hard to keep that which has not been obtained through personal development.So here's the great axiom of life:To Have More Than You've Got, Become More Than You Are.This is where you should focus most of your attention. Otherwise, you just might have to contend with the axiom of not changing, which is:Unless You Change How You Are, You'll Always Have What You've Got.

For Information on Jim Rohn's and other success products, go to: http://www.jimrohn.com/default.asp?kbid=6343

Have a great day!
Yours Positively
Danick Buskermolen

Your Independence Day

2006-07-06T09:39:00.000+10:00

Hello,

Happy independence day to all our friends in the USA. I hope you had a great celebration!

How's your week been? Mine's been very eventful as I move forward with wedding investigations, which got me thinking about big life changes. We all have changes that we'd like to see in our lives, but maybe haven't been committed enough to pay the price for making the choices and taking the actions to make these things happen.

But did you know that you don't have to wait one day longer to make these things happen for yourself. You no longer have to live from your past. Your past does not dictate what your future will be. You can make the changes to create a life that will be fulfilling, joyful and peaceful. It can start today with simple actions and choices.

It could be as simple as deciding to replace an old negative habit with a new positive one. It could be reading a book that could help you with the ideas and motivation to make healthier choices, decisions or goals for your life. Click Here to get some free life changing ebooks.

It could be as simple as forgiving someone for past mistakes, even if it's yourself. They can't change the past any more than you can, we can only learn from it and move on. So today, why not forgive, learn, choose or read to make a profound difference to your future. Let's you and I do something today, and everyday, that will make that difference.

yours positively
Danick Buskermolen

The Importance of Family

2006-06-24T10:15:00.000+10:00

Tonight we have a family dinner with my fiance's family. I love that he has such strong family values, and that his family is soooooo important to him. His father is in town from interstate, and we are all getting together at his mothers house with the the direct and indirect family.

I think it's remarkable that his parents, who have been divorced for over 25 years, are still friends, and that his dad still considers his ex-wife's family, his family. Now this is no reflection on any other person's situation where that kind of harmony isn't possible. There are a variety of reasons why this would not be possible for many families. But the values of peace and harmony, and certainly maturity....being BIG people are present here. Being grateful for the good things in the past, and being mature enough to accept things as they now are.

None of this would be possible, if both parties hadn't been willing to not play, or stop playing 'the blame game'. No relationship is perfect. You wanna know why? There are people in 'em. And no person I know is perfect. Tolerance and acceptance of people for where they're at.

A very wise friend of mine once said "We all walk in the light with which we have". I just love that. We are all accountable to our own God given conscience. And the areas that give me pause might be completely different to you. But as we stay accountable to our values, and have more grace for ourselves and others, and quit trashing relationships in our own egoistic need to be right, we will all lead much more fulfilling and abundant lives.

there we are, that's my 2 cents for today.

Do you have any thoughts? Please let me know.

yours positively
Danick Buskermolen
www.maximisedfreedom.com

Is Your Attitude Costing You?

2006-06-07T11:38:00.000+10:00

This is a very exciting and daunting time in my life, as I recently got engaged and I’m starting to plan a wedding. Yesterday as I started to make some preliminary investigations into function venues, I discovered a few things that were of particular note.

I started my investigations on the net and made a couple of phone calls. There were a few places really making my life a lot easier. They had ready made packages and costings, different options and included a lot of the things I would otherwise have to go and outsource. Some included linen, cake, place for ceremony, others a bridal suite for accommodation with breakfast and champagne etc.

Of the few phone calls I made a couple of things became obvious, some couldn’t have been nicer and made me feel special and like they appreciated my potential business offering us a complimentary breakfast to come and see the venue properly, and others weren’t even available on the phone with full voicemail. When reviewing some of the packages, they were not only priced above many other places, but they were so strict and stringent in their conditions, times, costs, it didn’t seem to me that they had any flexibility in making our day personal and special.

Whereas other places were not only kind and flexible, but made me feel as though they would not only appreciate our business, but make it personal and special to us.

It’s a day in ones life that takes a lot of organising and potentially there are several things that could go awry. But if you have developed a flexible and warm relationship with those people you’re working with to create this day, it fosters trust and loyalty. How many businesses are losing customers because they’re inflexible or impersonal and they don’t foster warm and trusting relationships with customers, and are prepared to make things easier and provide solutions for them. Afterall, isn’t that what business is supposed to be about!

What Do You Think?

Danick Buskermolen
www.maximisedfreedom.com

Are You Sleep Deprived

2006-06-06T09:42:00.000+10:00

I sometimes find it hard to get to sleep. And sometimes I wake up before I’m ready and I’m unable to get back to sleep. Does this ever happen to you?

Through the years, there a few observations I’ve made about sleep that can help me sleep better.

1: Caffeine – I’m not a coffee drinker, but there are many other things with caffeine in that I find I’m very sensitive to. I can have just so much first thing in the morning. But after lunch I’d better quit. I know exactly what my tolerance is, so I need to stick within those limits.

2: Exercise – If I haven’t been physically active enough in a day, and burnt off enough physical energy, it may affect my sleep. So I just need to make sure my life and days are balanced and I’m getting some physical exertion each day.

3: Busy Mind – Have you noticed when there’s a lot going on in your life, or you’re excited about something, it’s hard to sleep. Things to do are to make sure you haven’t had too much caffeine or too little exercise, cos they’ll just make it worse.
Decide on a switch off time for the stimulating evening activities. Don’t do work or phone calls after a certain time. And decide to switch the tv off at a particular time each night, so as not to be overstimulated.
Other things to do are to make a list, or journal your thoughts, to get it out you’re your head onto paper, and know that you’ve captured the thoughts and nothing is lost. Once you’ve done that, I’ve found reading a novel helps to settle me, cos it distracts my mind from the busy-ness and help me settle.

4: Warm Drink – The tried and true method of chamomile tea or warm milk are often good.

5: Bedtime Routine – Certain neural pathways are established when you do the same routine every evening. It may include a warm drink, shower or bath, brush your teeth and wash your face. Your body and mind will soon know this is your preparation for sleep time.

So these are just things from my own experience. I hope they may benefit you too. You may even have a few ideas of your own. Please feel free to share them with us.

Have a positive day (and night ;-)
Danick Buskermolen
www.maximisedfreedom.com

Financial Goals

2006-06-05T15:45:00.000+10:00

I’ve just been thinking about goals and the beginning of a new month. Many smaller goals are achievable or finishable in a period of time such as a month. And in Australia our financial year runs from July to June. So this month marks the end of our financial year.

This has led me to thinking about the things I need to finish this month in order to get the maximum tax deduction. This also leads me to thinking about financial goals, and the ones I set at the beginning of the fiscal year last year.

Some I’ve already achieved, some I’ve exceeded, and some I’m not even in the ball park. Where are you up to with your financial goals? Or any other goals?

Which ones can you either achieve, or make a huge dent in this month?
I’m gonna stay focussed. Are you?

Have a positive day
Danick Buskermolen
www.maximisedfreedom.com

2006-06-02T10:37:00.000+10:00

What’s he deal with this generation gap?

Why, so often do we feel we have nothing to learn from those who are older or younger than ourselves. The old expression, “With age comes wisdom.” is so often true.

Sure it’s a different age now, the age of technology, the twenty-first century. But an ancient prophet one said, there is nothing new under the sun.

Personally, I have really learnt a lot from many people much older than myself. Perhaps not technological things, but practical and life things, relational things. And from kids there is much to learn and certainly much to be remembered, like getting excited about new experiences, tastes, smells etc. Being grateful and enthusiastic about every little thing.

So today I’m making up my mind to listen to everybody differently today. To appreciate all people, no matter what their age or peer group, and to remain teachable in all things, cos if you’re really paying attention, there is so much to learn.

What do you think?

ttys

Danick Buskermolen www.maximisedfreedom.com

Welcome

2006-05-20T06:35:00.000+10:00

Welcome to the Maximised Freedom blog.

I'll be adding comments and thoughts here from time to time. I'll add links to things that are of interest or help to me. Hopefully some will be of interest to you.

I look forward to getting to know you, through your thoughts and comments.

Let's enjoy the journey.

see you soon
Danick